Shark Attacks: Apparently Not Funny.

 Posted by Bob the Hamster on April 6th, 2005

Current mood: Embarrassed and Hungry

So a fellow student in my sculpture class was working on a life-size torso. Just the torso, no head, arms, or anything south of the bellybutton. She had named it “Shark Attack” but felt the name was too traumatic, and was trying to think of another name.

I offered that I thought “Shark Attack” was a great name for it.

“You see, the thing about shark attacks is, as horrible, horrible, horrible an idea as it is, shark attacks are funny!”

“What?” she goes.

“It just automatically sounds tongue-in-cheek. Shark attacks are funny. You can’t take them seriously.”

I could see she wasn’t buying it. In fact, she was looking at me funny.

“Maybe because it is so rare?” I offered, “I mean, I know people have died that way, but, like” I searched for an appropriate hyperbole comparing shark attack victims to lightening strike victims or lottery winners, but came up dry.

“No, I don’t think so.” she says. Her friend shakes her head with a slightly disgusted look on her face.

“Is it just me?” I asked, reddening. Do I just have a sick mind?

A while later I realized what it was. When I think of shark attacks, my entire mental and emotional context for the concept comes from Gary Larson. Darn you Gary! You have made me look like a psychopath one too many times!

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